Conflict is a natural part of all relationships and can actually help strengthen relationships and lead to positive outcomes. Practicing mindful communication— being fully aware and present while engaging with others— can help us navigate conflict more effectively.

A few elements of mindful communication include:

Awareness of what we're communicating and how we're communicating (i.e. body language, posture, tone)
Listening attentively to what the other person is saying
Noticing feelings that arise and other internal experiences (i.e. thoughts, beliefs, physical sensations, etc.)
Openness to hearing the other person's perspective and offering understanding and/or empathy

For many, conflict often triggers states of distress. This may look like defensive ("fight mode") or stonewalling ("flight mode") reactions, making it difficult to practice the skills necessary to resolving conflict. We are best able to practice mindful communication when in a present and regulated emotional state, which allows us to show up to the conversation with a sense of openness and curiosity and work towards a resolution.

If you feel overwhelmed by emotion during a conflict and/or find yourself shutting down or becoming defensive, pause and take the time you need to regulate before revisiting the conversation. Try getting in the habit of asking yourself whether you're showing up to a conflict feeling regulated, calm and able to engage in mindful communication, and, if not, what can you do to help yourself get there?